Hmm...He sounds....weak?  Soft?  I think he’s doing two things wrong: he’s Timberfaking the vocal, and he’s sitting, limiting his diaphragmatic breath control.  And as soon as he stands, he sounds a lot stronger.  Still Timberfake, though.  Or rather like a mix between a Timberlake wannabe and a white kid who wishes he was either Blake or Stevie Wonder.

Donna: “I’m finding this performance totally uninspiring.” Yeah me too.  Boring.  And he ended on what must have been a run of thirty-seven different notes.  JUST SING THE SONG!  Of course the judges will love it.

Randy: “For the first time in a long time for me, dude, you in it to win it.” Whatever.  They always love his Timberfake performances.
Paula: “You did fantastic...really well done...really proud of you...see your journey.” What journey?  That is the same thing he’s always done!
Simon: “It kind of feels like the competition starts tonight.” “It was a good vocal...more soul in it...I think you did really well.” Yes, as a Timberlake impressionist!  Opposite day once again for us and the judges over Chris.

1-866-IDOLS-01
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1-866-IDOLS-07

What can I say?  You’d expect her to SANG the snot out of this and make it melodramatic and huge, and that’s precisely what she’s doing.  She looks thrilled to be doing it, she’s singing her ass off, she’s on tune, huge when needed, finishes soft...precisely what you expect from the pro.  The crowd can barely stop cheering.

Randy: “MELINDA IS HERE!”
Paula: “There’s no one like you.” I can’t wait for the night with you?  Come ON!  Scorpions humor rules.
Simon: “It wasn’t a copycat performance...you made me believe you recorded it originally.” “That really was a vocal master class.” Not much else to add.

1-866-IDOLS-02
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1-866-IDOLS-08

Nope.  Just a straight, boring, nowhere-near-exciting-or-inspiring performance.  It’s nice, but.  That’s the best thing I can say.  Nice, but.  The but is “I was bored.”

Randy: “It was just kind of a’ight for me dog.”
Paula: “I really enjoyed it.” She emphasized the simplicity and emotion.
Simon: “It didn’t go anywhere...you sang it with sincerity.”

1-866-IDOLS-03
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1-866-IDOLS-09

Umm...she didn’t finish the word “edge” in the first line.  She sang “Have you ever reached a rainbow’s ehhhhhhhh....” She was avoiding her lisp.  Oh man, she’s ALL over the place key-wise.  She’s blowing this left right and center.  She’s also screaming at the top of her lungs again.

Man...was I wrong about this woman.  She’s nowhere near ready for something like this.  She’s just lucky that so many others were so awful.  She might be the next to go if Phil Stacey does well.

Randy: “A couple pitch problems...wasnt your best, but I did like it.”
Paula: “You are a powerhouse vocalist...I have a hard time getting past Fantasia.” She’s trying to say “Bad song choice” honey.
Simon: “Again I’m having an issue, LaKisha, with the shouting...” and then the crowd interrupts him and he yells at them.  ;)

1-866-IDOLS-04
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1-866-IDOLS-10

Err...why is Michael McDonald singing a Garth Brooks song?  No wise man has the power to reason this into a good performance.  Why is Phil Stacey alternating between himself and a Michael McDonald impression?  Does this fool believe that we’ll like him if he sounds like he’s fronting the Doobie Brothers?  Anyway...at least he stayed on key and was, as Donna said, passionate about this song.  Feh...he’s not a pop star at all.  He’s just the best singer on his ship.  He’ll probably always be the best singer at any wedding...unless of course Jill Gioia is there.  ;)

Randy: “You’re back again this week...very nice vocal....”
Paula: “This was your best.” WTF?
Simon: “I really like you...good choice of song...” He advised him to slip that country tone back into his voice.  All the judges are trying to save Phil for some reason.

1-866-IDOLS-05

She’s really very, very good, especially considering that she’s 17 and could only get better with time, practice and training.  This is a syrupy ballad so it’s not my cup of tea, but she’s knocking it out of the park.  There were maybe two teeny tiny moments when her throat seemed dry or like she has a cold or something, but they were minute.  Excellent performance if schmaltz is your cup of tea.  Big finish for the show.

Randy: “One of the best vocals of anyone ever...from someone who is seventeen years old!”
Paula: “You’re glorious.”
Simon: “Unlike Randy, I thought you were fantastic.” That song is about 60 years old - I think you’d have a hit record with that.” Maybe.  It was HUGE.

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